The What? New Resolution? Or Is Just My New Obsession?

“Try to write something, try to write something, try to write something~~” those spell. I am trying to write something since my head feels so full with lots of thing. Like the title of this post. I just questioning tons of things. Maybe I will post 1 post today since am too lazy to upload the previous one. Let’s start!!

               

                Where should I start? Oh, okay. It’s a New Year, not the celebration, but literal meaning of New Year. Getting tired to continue my thesis right now. Need something new to trigger my will to read and write more and again. And I decide to become one of the admin of bunch-hottest-uncles-in-asia-that-called-themselves-an-idol-with-average-age-is-38-years-old fan base. That’s long. I knew it. It’s so hard to explain it here. So, the English meaning of their name is six pebbles, yeah, that pebbles. The small stones. It’s from Germany and people interpret it as crystals. People called them Sechskies. Of course, they are from Korea. The only country that I will refer to tons of times. Never get tired of Korean thing. This idol group just come back from really long sleep, for 16 years or so. They just made their comeback last year and their ‘native’ fans go crazy again about them. What surprising is that they signed with my most favorite agency ever, YG Ent. Woo~ get excited just because hearing the agency’s name. Damn amazing!!! At first, I didn’t give a damn about them because the time is not right. I did abandoned BIGBANG too at that time because I have tons of activity. It was the beginning of my SLP program and am working with foreigner too. So, I didn’t give a damn to BIGBANG and Sechskies. I did download their song titled ‘Three Words’, I did. But, who cares? I like their music, so I leave it like that. After few months, I start to watch variety show again since am so bored because of thesis and seminar. I was watching Infinity Challenge and told myself that I should watch Sechskies’ episode because am curious about them. How can they sign a contract with YG? Who are they? That are the question in my head. I only know one of the member. His name is Eun Jiwon. That’s it. I know him from a show called Strong Heart which was a show from 7 years ago. I keep watching the show and I fall for them. Not so hard but enough to make my day ruined. I found them so amazing. Their friendship is amazing and they still have the will to work together as a team after separated for more than 10 years. From that show, I found out that they become guest star in other show, too. So, I look for that show and watch them. I fall for them, again, this time harder. I decided to become one of their lover. At first, it’s hard to find their international fans because they are new to the international world. I keep searching and searching until I find something. Then I saw this announcement, it says that they need few admins for this just-come-back-group fan base in Indonesia. I hesitated, at first, then I decided to join them. I have no intention to do something back then. I just want to join them. That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less. Never imagine that I will have an idea to make a project. So happy that I can contribute something small for them. Even though, I have to lose some of my money to buy their goods and I just lose almost a million rupiah only for this. Not gonna regret it. Am just amaze by myself that I can purchased those things. For total, I spend more than IDR 1million for both BIGBANG and Sechkies.

                The more amazing thing is that they’re much older than me. While am still in my early 20s, they already in their late 30s. It’s so funny. I’m still questioning myself how I can like those uncles. It does not make any sense. I fall for the leader and the eldest member of the group. Yoo-hoo~ again. After all this time, I always fall for the eldest. Yeah~ Why it has to be the eldest member? Me, myself, still questioning that question. The eldest always charming? The eldest always has different charm? I love someone who is older? But the age gap is too big. It is 17 years. God, even his age is like my parents’ marriage age. My parents got married in 1978, November and he was born in 1978, June. What a coincidence! My parents waited for me for 17 years and our age gap is 17 years. So, in other word, I could possibly has the same age as him. But, you know, I like someone who is older than me. So, I think that one is okay. Even, it feels weird because of the age. Okay, so age is just a number but still, it is a big number. It is a number, but still too big for me. So, I just love him. Much in love with him. I know it’s weird but that’s okay because we don’t really meet and I’m just a fan, nothing less and nothing more. It’s hard to explain but at the other side, I’m scared that everything will be the opposite. If so, I have to visit psychiatrist to check my mental health. I will consider myself as crazy if it’s really happening. I never fall this hard before. Even for TOP. I just love him. That’s it. I think, I found someone I know in that person. Even though, just through a TV program. I will stop here. It’s getting weird.

                Still looking for the reason why I love them so much. I love BIGBANG because they’re such an inspiration. For, Sechskies? I don’t know. I just met them. I grew up with BIGBANG so more or less I know how they achieve their goal. I just knew Sechskies just few minutes ago and I barely know them. I adore their friendship, I do. Even, they don’t really have the perfect friendship. I’m new to this world. Just live for almost 22 years and their friendship, like people say, is 20 years. I try to be objective here. I don’t want to be bias. I realize that I adore them but it doesn’t mean that I will love everything about them. Hey, they’re still human being. They never be perfect, so do I. At least, I have to have a reason to love them. The reason that can make me hang onto to them for a while or until the end. For a good a reason. Even, when they’re not together anymore and choose separate ways. I love BIGBANG for a good reason. So, I want to love Sechskies for a good reason to. Not only love them because they’re good looking in many ways. I hope I can find it soon.